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I’m a physician (M.D.), writer and entrepreneur. For the first 26 years of my life, I followed the “supposed to” path. I went through the motions, never questioning why I am doing what I am doing and became a physician. I enjoyed parts of it, but something always felt like it was missing; I wasn’t excited about the life I was existing in. I kind of just assumed that this is what life was supposed to feel like. Numb most of the time, complaining about how much you hate everything, making sure your life looks like success to others, then enjoying some moments of escapism with cheap dopamine.

While everyone else seemed somewhat interested in what we were learning about in school, and some seemed to get genuine fulfillment from the work, I was just there to check boxes. I did what I had to do to secure my “success” but never felt genuinely curious about it. I learned it, I was good at it but it always felt like my soul’s work wasn’t being expressed. Then as I matured, I realized that these, days, that I was “getting over with” were my life itself. Time didn’t care that I wasn’t enjoying what I was doing, it went on regardless.

I wish I could say I figured it out at that point, but instead I just kept going the same way, just with more escapism added so I could at least be “happy” in some moments. Going out to eat, chasing girls, listening to music and fantasizing about a life that didn’t exist were some of my favourites. I went on like this until eventually even the escapes didn’t feel good anymore. Through the self-development rabbit hole we all go down when we aren’t happy, I at least built up the ability for self analysis. I became aware enough to recognize that I was just doing all this stuff to escape the life I had built for myself that from the outside looking in, appeared to be “success”. And so, I could no longer enjoy the cheap dopamine. Damn it.

I was always entrepreneurial and creative as a kid. I was funny, good at writing and loved to tell stories from the get. I enjoyed building something from nothing, selling jerseys, headphones, shoes, you name it. I loved making people laugh and teaching them things I had just learned. I was an old soul, always thinking about bigger ideas and the “why” of it all. All of that got ignored and pushed to the side in favour of the “safe” and tried and true path of becoming a physician. You know how it is in immigrant families; doctor, lawyer, engineer or failure. The thought of a creative pursuit as my life’s work didn’t even enter my mind at the time. So like a good boy, I pushed aside what lit up my soul and mindlessly began down the path of “success”.

As I mentioned above, once the escapes didn’t feel good any more I had to change them. The escapes became all the things I loved doing as a kid. I went down the rabbit hole of self-development, philosophy, meaning, spirituality, money and everything that was relevant to getting my life to where I wanted it to be. The escapes became reading, exploring genuine curiosities, writing and building businesses around my true passions and abilities. Funny enough, when I started doing more of what my soul was calling me to do, I started enjoying being a physician more too. I wasn’t approaching it as the thing that prevented me from living the life I want, instead as a piece of that life. I didn’t want to just write prescriptions and operate the conveyer belt of patients that is modern medicine.

I now practice medicine in the way I enjoy, as part of my life, not the whole of it. I focus on preventative care and try to get to and address root causes of patient’s problems rather than doing patch work on symptoms. I spend the rest of my time working on my businesses and creative pursuits while enjoying myself with great people, not as an escape, but as a celebration of a life well lived.

Of course, there is no end-point, I am still figuring things out and there are days where I feel lost and frustrated. This platform is a way for me to reflect on the thoughts in my mind and gain clarity for myself. I share what I have learned, continue to learn, and what I am curious about. The posts here are basically my public journal that allow me to work through and make sense of my ideas. Hopefully all of this helps you in gaining some clarity and finding your own path.

I hope I can play a small part in helping you discover your life’s true path. The one your soul is calling you to do, but you keeping ignoring it and pushing it down. I hope I can play a small part in helping you gain clarity and make sense of this odd existence we call “life”. I hope I can help you navigate the ideas and curiosities beyond the first pursuit of a boxed in life.

I’ll leave you with my favourite quote, that never fails to awaken my conscience every time I read it:

We have two lives, and the second begins when we realize we have only one.

This is not a dress rehearsal my friends. Stop getting your days over with. Stop just existing, and start living.

Go on your second pursuit…

You can find my personal socials below.